Julia Cameron wrote in The Artist’s Way, “Leap and the net will appear.” Her words not only stoke a cord and stuck, they grew from an acorn into a tree, which multiplied into many. I am now ready to enter the magic forest of my True Self…
For years now I have had one relentless bundle of thoughts surface in my mind and tug and tug on me for days until I’d manage to put them to sleep, tuck them away into the deepest recesses of my mind so that I can refocus on all the things I needed to do and get on with my life. Then, after some time had passed, the tugging would resurface again. Now I know that this idea, this impulse was planted in my mind long ago. It was like a rootkit, something that computer hackers use to plant a code that is nearly impossible to detect. It then scans and watches over the user’s activity, to resurface and make an impact when the time is ripe. Now, my code, while hard to deal with at times, turns out was of the nature that would propel me to manifest my true destiny path. It is my code of light.
The bundle of thoughts are actually a series of questions I didn’t want to face because they either scared me or made me feel like I was selling myself short. I believe this is the question many people ask themselves at some point in their lives. Some learn to manage it, in other words, keep it under wraps as it truly doesn’t fell good to know that they are not living their dreams. Trust me. It feels like crap. I’m speaking from experience. And then there are those few who take the giant leap. To the rest of us they seem lucky but I believe that luck has very little to do with it. As I am learning at the moment, it looks to me as rather a combination of alignment and timing.
Alignment, which can take a bit of time to achieve requires building sensitivity and listening to the internal whispers of your soul and attuning to the intuitive voice of higher guidance. It also requires paying attention to all the things that are playing out in our outer lives, our environment, and how they impact how we feel. Most of us act from a center we anchored into way back in our childhood. Even though it can be very limiting, it makes us feel safe because it is familiar. What we need to do, is dig deep, do some healing work if necessary and re-pattern or shift into a new frequency that will resonate more with the life we want to live. We can seek help, read books, journal, take a yoga class, sign up for a marathon, make new friends or all of the above. The key is to do what we love for a day, open our heart and see what happens. We must step off the cliff, the comfort zone that chains us into sameness, in order to fly.
I believe that energy and time move in a spiral motion across space. At certain times in our lives, windows of opportunities open when the time is ripe to make the leap. It is like someone is banging at the door so loudly we cannot sleep. We get confused, it gets hard to focus and everything seems to fall apart, not just the dishes that fall out of our shaking hands. The time is ripe, everything is aligned for you to make that leap. But you are not ready. Well, next time you come around on the spiral journey, the banging will get louder. Maybe then you will cross the gate. Maybe that time is now?
As the doors open, the gravitational force on the other side pulls us across and provides resources. What it takes is a commitment. Gravity, as we know, is a force to be reckoned with. Jesus once said, and I am paraphrasing here, that if we don’t follow our calling, the very thing that will provide us with the greatest joy our heart ever felt, will end up killing us. I’m serious, he was that direct. I don’t want to scare anyone but I admit that there is a lot of truth to this profound statement. The longer I put it off, the more stressed and out of balance I felt until even my health was becoming compromised. This is why I can no longer wait. I am doing it to save my life.
To many, money might be an obstacle. I think it can be very interesting to travel on the edge, which makes us a bit more community oriented and co-dependent. Growing up I was taught by my mother, who for years was completely dependent on my father’s rare acts of generosity, that the most important thing in life, especially to a woman, is to be independent, a lesson she is now also letting go of as her soul is softening into the blissful surrender of her new found love. I will never let myself be irresponsible but I am open to receiving help and assistance, as I am willing to share my resources. It feels healthier this way, a dynamic balance of vital opposites.
Vanity & Familiarity
For a few years now I planned to take off for a year to travel around the world. My trip has always been a year away. As I planned it in my head, thoughts such as these entered my concerned mind: what will I do about my hair? How about bathing in the remote mountains of Tajikistan? Will I be able to say goodbye to my lattes for that long? So you see, with worries of this sort, how would I ever make the leap? How can we ever jump if inside we flustered about such details?
A note that hangs on my sister’s corkboard: “If I’m not home accepting what I can’t change, I’m probably out, changing what I can’t accept.” I love it.
When you commit, make a ritual around it. It is good to devote a day to make the internal preparations for an impending journey into the unknown. We need to face our fears and if we cannot melt all of them, accept the rest and move forward anyway. Committment is key. It is vital that you shower yourself with self-love and clear from your life all that doesn’t serve you anymore. Slow down, don’s stress. Pay close attention to every moment of my precious life. Look for signs. Things will fall into place naturally. Dance, stretch drink pure water, clean, let go of things you no longer want/need. Enter the birth canal and do so with strong intent.